Here is something that shocks everyone I tell... J was the love of my life. For all the things she did to me, I still think of her fondly. I sometimes wonder what my answer would be if one day she asked me to take her back. But I digress...
We met while I was in Okinawa Japan. She was married to a GI at the time. She led me to believe that he was abusive, both physically and mentally, so I had to play the "White Knight" (I was very much in that mode at the time).
What I DIDN'T know was that she had some pretty severe mental issues that were not being treated at the time. What were they? She was severely BI-Polar. At that time I don't this they really HAD a treatment for it but suffice it to say she was mentally ill.
She left her husband and moved in with me (I lived off base) and when he filed for and was granted a divorce, she was force to go back to the states. I spent one of vacation weeks to go visit her in Los Angles. When I got back to Japan, I sold my prized possession at the time (an apple computer that I had built from scratch) and paid for her ticket back to Japan on a tourist visa. We got married over there and were VERY happy. We ended up moving to Dover Delaware after that which is where the s**t really hit the fan.
I went on a couple temporary tours of duty during our time together. Once when I was gone, She hired a photographer to come over to our house and take some picture of her in a selection of her lingerie. When I got home, I was VERY excited and happy the she did this for me! It was something that I had always wished for. A wife willing to do it and was good looking enough to do it and for her to love me enough to do them for me! Little did I know...
I went to Florida on my own while we were married because we had 2 dogs that could NOT be left alone in the house under any circumstances. I called J every day and each day she seemed a little stranger and a little stranger... Finally wanting me home right now and not a second later, she told me she had swallowed a number of pills to try to commit suicide! I called the base (we were living on base at the time), told them what she had done and took the next flight home.
They (of course) put her under 3 day observation and she finally came out and said she didn't actually take any pills but she thought she "dreamed" the whole thing because she was so desperate to get me home for fear that I would leave her when I got back! She ended up staying in the hospital psyhc for a month to try and get her head on straight.
At one point I was asked into a joint session because there were some things J needed to share with me. It was then that I learned... She had cheated on me as well. wit my best friend (AGAIN!), The photography that took the picture (I thought I smelled Jerry-curl on my pillow when I got home!) PLUS 2 other guys that I didn't know!!!
I was devastated! We continued couples counseling for the rest of the time she was in... When she got out, we were doing very well! The trust wasn't fully back yet but things were working out.
Since I wasn't making much in the AF, she did a little job hopping trying to find something with decent income. She was working as a receptionist for a company when things went totally awry...
I noticed something was off because she started listening to country western (Up till this point we both HATED the stuff!), got some short shorts, a cowboy hat and cowboy boots.
To make a long story short, she had met a Master Sergeant (Made a LOT more than I did) and was changing herself to match what he was looking for. The next sit happened VERY quickly... she quit her job, got her own place, got divorced from me and married him!!
I have to pass this part on, I started to think that she wasn't dissatisfied with me but more with the money I brought in. We were in Albuquerque, NM when all this happened. Now the wait time for a divorce in ALQ was a month... she couldn't wait that long.. so she had the lawyer send the papers to a different county in NM where the wait time was only 3 days!.. The divorce was finalized on a Friday. On Sat her and her new money source were in Vegas and on Sunday the were married. yes.. that quick...
How you may ask was I finally convinced it was money and not me? I saw her like twice after she married the sucker... er... Master Sargent... When I asked what he was like or if she was happy, her response was "Oh very! her has a gold card you know! A Platinum one too!"
I love Karma... if often bites people in the ass that really deserve it... in this case, she went up to Wisconsin to visit the only family she had and when she got back, all of her stuff was in the front yard and there was a note on the door... "I changed the locks on the house so don't bother. I am filing for divorce."
Gotcha
I lost her after that... Last I heard was many years about, she was married to a retired colonel or something (They make BIG money!)
Saturday, May 30, 2015
First Wife...
We will call her "D" to avoid pointing out the guilty.
D bore me 2 wonderful children (They do have their problems but they are mine and no one can change that.) We were married for 7 years. I am not sure what happened, I know that I was little (OK a LOT) more sexually adventurous than she was and that caused a bit of friction between us. To make a very LOOONG story short, she ended up cheating on me (with my best friend no less!) We tried to work it out but about 1 year after it happened, due to my unhappiness (and a "budget" that I was making for IF we broke up, left on the table, and that she found) she ended up leaving my and taking herself and her kids back to Michigan, where we were both from. To this day, I am sure that when I made that budget, something in my subconscious made me leave it on the table for her to find. Of course there is no proof one way of the other.
I wrote to the kids (who were like 2 and 5 at the time) but never got a response. Thanks to the lovely D, we had agreed to a certain amount of child support when she left. When she filed for divorce in Mich, her lawyer "recommended" twice what we had agreed upon, with a grandfather clause that meant I now owed her some $5,000! Back in 1981, that was HELL of a lot of money for an airman to come up with and pay back! So, because I couldn't pay it back, they issued a bench warrant against me.
Now those of you who are familiar with the armed forces know that being arrested and thrown in jail would pretty much end your career. As a result, I couldn't go back to Mich for any reason for about 1 year, the time it took to pay the money back. By the time I was able to get leave and get back to Mich to see my kids, they were about 1 year and some change months older. My boy ("R"), the eldest remembered me and knew who I was. My girl ("G") Did not. We had a couple of pleasant outings but at the end of the last one, D kept me outside and told me that there was a new man in her life that they were calling "daddy" and that all my presence was doing was confusing them and making them very unhappy (I found out in my late adult years that neither of these were the case.) D thought it would be best if I just stayed away, don't write and just leave them alone and let them be where they are. Now I have to admit, I was a kid... 26, dumb, ignorant of my rights... anyway I agreed. I did exactly that. I paid my child support and stayed away. I was secure in the knowledge though, that if they really wanted to know their real dad, one day they would look me up
About 4 years ago, I got a call out of no where... I said "Hello", "Is this Don Willson?" "Yes it is, can I help you?", "This is your son R" I almost fainted!!! It actually happened!! We stayed on the phone a long while, catching up and getting to know each other. He, being a trucker, had the opportunity to come down my way and visit!!! It took a little longer for G to get a hold of me but she finally did and we all have been getting to know each other since!
I have to give kudos to their mother though, she never said a single bad word about me nor did she try to stop them when they wanted to look me up! Kudos D!!!
So, my kids and I are in the process of getting to know each other. R and I have a few interests in common but to be honest, D spoiled him to the point where he can barely handle his private life in a proper and decent manner - always late on bills, negligible personal hygiene, buys a new car when he doesn't need one and doesn't pay on it, etc... She did everything for him and basically gave him everything he ever wanted so now, as an adult, he expects everything he wants to be given to him of to come his way naturally. Now his BUSINESS attitude is WONDERFUL!! He has been promoted very quickly in his chosen field and continues to do his job exceedingly well and has a bright future ahead of him! I do wish he would replace his dentures though... he has no teeth at 40 due to a genetics issue, used his temps for 3 years and broke them. Now he wears nothing and gums all his food (shudder).
My daughter has her issues as well, most caused by D and whats REALLY scary is that she is the one I have the most in common with! We are like two peas in a pod! A good 90% of what she likes, I like as well! It's weird... very weird... but nice as well... It's nice to have someone look up to you, respect you and share things in common with! I just wish I was ther while she was growing up... I would not have ignored her medical issues the way D did, and I think she would have been a lot better off.
But we shall never know...
If any of this doesn't make too much sense, please forgive... Had a LOT to say and tried VERY hard to put all the important arts in without turning the entry into a VERY LOOOONG book! LOL
D bore me 2 wonderful children (They do have their problems but they are mine and no one can change that.) We were married for 7 years. I am not sure what happened, I know that I was little (OK a LOT) more sexually adventurous than she was and that caused a bit of friction between us. To make a very LOOONG story short, she ended up cheating on me (with my best friend no less!) We tried to work it out but about 1 year after it happened, due to my unhappiness (and a "budget" that I was making for IF we broke up, left on the table, and that she found) she ended up leaving my and taking herself and her kids back to Michigan, where we were both from. To this day, I am sure that when I made that budget, something in my subconscious made me leave it on the table for her to find. Of course there is no proof one way of the other.
I wrote to the kids (who were like 2 and 5 at the time) but never got a response. Thanks to the lovely D, we had agreed to a certain amount of child support when she left. When she filed for divorce in Mich, her lawyer "recommended" twice what we had agreed upon, with a grandfather clause that meant I now owed her some $5,000! Back in 1981, that was HELL of a lot of money for an airman to come up with and pay back! So, because I couldn't pay it back, they issued a bench warrant against me.
Now those of you who are familiar with the armed forces know that being arrested and thrown in jail would pretty much end your career. As a result, I couldn't go back to Mich for any reason for about 1 year, the time it took to pay the money back. By the time I was able to get leave and get back to Mich to see my kids, they were about 1 year and some change months older. My boy ("R"), the eldest remembered me and knew who I was. My girl ("G") Did not. We had a couple of pleasant outings but at the end of the last one, D kept me outside and told me that there was a new man in her life that they were calling "daddy" and that all my presence was doing was confusing them and making them very unhappy (I found out in my late adult years that neither of these were the case.) D thought it would be best if I just stayed away, don't write and just leave them alone and let them be where they are. Now I have to admit, I was a kid... 26, dumb, ignorant of my rights... anyway I agreed. I did exactly that. I paid my child support and stayed away. I was secure in the knowledge though, that if they really wanted to know their real dad, one day they would look me up
About 4 years ago, I got a call out of no where... I said "Hello", "Is this Don Willson?" "Yes it is, can I help you?", "This is your son R" I almost fainted!!! It actually happened!! We stayed on the phone a long while, catching up and getting to know each other. He, being a trucker, had the opportunity to come down my way and visit!!! It took a little longer for G to get a hold of me but she finally did and we all have been getting to know each other since!
I have to give kudos to their mother though, she never said a single bad word about me nor did she try to stop them when they wanted to look me up! Kudos D!!!
So, my kids and I are in the process of getting to know each other. R and I have a few interests in common but to be honest, D spoiled him to the point where he can barely handle his private life in a proper and decent manner - always late on bills, negligible personal hygiene, buys a new car when he doesn't need one and doesn't pay on it, etc... She did everything for him and basically gave him everything he ever wanted so now, as an adult, he expects everything he wants to be given to him of to come his way naturally. Now his BUSINESS attitude is WONDERFUL!! He has been promoted very quickly in his chosen field and continues to do his job exceedingly well and has a bright future ahead of him! I do wish he would replace his dentures though... he has no teeth at 40 due to a genetics issue, used his temps for 3 years and broke them. Now he wears nothing and gums all his food (shudder).
My daughter has her issues as well, most caused by D and whats REALLY scary is that she is the one I have the most in common with! We are like two peas in a pod! A good 90% of what she likes, I like as well! It's weird... very weird... but nice as well... It's nice to have someone look up to you, respect you and share things in common with! I just wish I was ther while she was growing up... I would not have ignored her medical issues the way D did, and I think she would have been a lot better off.
But we shall never know...
If any of this doesn't make too much sense, please forgive... Had a LOT to say and tried VERY hard to put all the important arts in without turning the entry into a VERY LOOOONG book! LOL
Hey All...
Well first off, I was thinking about changing the name of this to my "Let me bitch about my life" Blog. As you can see I didn't... But since
I changed it to what I did, I thought You guys really need to know something
about me before I posting to it.
I was thinking about telling you about my entire dysfunctional life, with my screwed up sisters, sexually abusive father, mother who chose to ignore what was going on because it was easier, my twin sister who died simply because she decided to stop fighting for life (I suspect that the fact that she sold the family jewels (literally) to feed her shopping addition had a little something to do with it), my gay brother who lived with my mother after my father died, gave him all of the money she was supposed to pass on to us kids and was told by a shrink that they were married without the sex. I could tell you all that... but I won't, this entry in the blog would be WAY too long... We're talking like BOOK long!
Then I thought about just telling you about my relationships (all 6 of them). Yes, 6 (or was it 5? Hmmm..) relationships. In all the time I have been alive, I have had 3 Girlfriends and 3 wives... Not an exciting life to be sure. But if I got into details on each one of those, This entry would still be 50 pages long.. too long to read for sure.
So, lets concentrate on the long lasting ones. AKA - the wives. In the next entry we will start where it all began...
I was thinking about telling you about my entire dysfunctional life, with my screwed up sisters, sexually abusive father, mother who chose to ignore what was going on because it was easier, my twin sister who died simply because she decided to stop fighting for life (I suspect that the fact that she sold the family jewels (literally) to feed her shopping addition had a little something to do with it), my gay brother who lived with my mother after my father died, gave him all of the money she was supposed to pass on to us kids and was told by a shrink that they were married without the sex. I could tell you all that... but I won't, this entry in the blog would be WAY too long... We're talking like BOOK long!
Then I thought about just telling you about my relationships (all 6 of them). Yes, 6 (or was it 5? Hmmm..) relationships. In all the time I have been alive, I have had 3 Girlfriends and 3 wives... Not an exciting life to be sure. But if I got into details on each one of those, This entry would still be 50 pages long.. too long to read for sure.
So, lets concentrate on the long lasting ones. AKA - the wives. In the next entry we will start where it all began...
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